I actually had a post that was scheduled to go up today about my Chicago Marathon goals. It explained how I was not shooting for a time goal, but was so proud of myself for getting to a point where I felt ready to finish the race. I came back and worked hard after missing a month of training when I dropped a 20lb weight on my foot, I stuck it out and squeezed workouts in on days when my hypothyroidism left me feeling exhausted, and most of all I proved to myself I could still do it.
On Monday I was walking down the stairs, missed a step, and went crashing to the bottom. My left ankles was instantly done and I was in so much pain I could not stop crying. I pretty much realized right then and there that after all my hard work, my long, disgustingly hot and humid summer runs, it was all nothing.
I went to the doctor and their x-rays show a chance of an Avulsion (or Chip) Fracture; however, they cannot tell for sure because there is too much blood and swelling. I will go back in 5-7 days for a final set of x-rays to get confirmation one way or the other. Until then I am supposed to treat it like it is broken and not put any weight on it at all.
The truth is that it is 3 days later and the swelling has not gone down at all! It is still massive and it hurts like hell. I could not put any weight on it if I wanted to anyway.
I am just devastated – this week and next week were supposed to be my last 2 big weeks of training before my taper for Chicago began. Now, whether it is a break or a sprain with the level of severity from this injury it will be at least a month, maybe more until I am up and running. I know that I cannot miss a full month of training, the biggest two weeks on my training schedule, and show up to run 26.2 miles in Chicago as my first run in 5 weeks. I am crushed. I am so sad that something I have been working toward since March is out the window. Plus, I am in a lot of pain which makes me grumpy!
On top of missing Chicago it is pretty impossible to teach without being able to walk and I am exhausted at the end of each day. I will admit that I come home feeling worn down, in a lot of pain, and all I want to do is cry, sleep, and eat – not the best I know. Heck, I cannot even get in and out of my shower so I am now showering only every 2/3 days which is disgusting, but all I can manage.
I know that there will be other races. I think I am the most pissed because Chicago was the last big one left on my bucket list – NYC, Marine Corp, and Chicago. My summer training was so horrid I swore I would never run another fall marathon that required summer training and I was so freaking happy to not have to do 100+ degree long runs after this cycle. However, now if I do want to run Chicago I will have to go through that horrible, hot, disgusting summer training one more time.
PS – This is also horrid timing because we are currently in the path of Irma and my schools are canceled for Friday, Monday, and Tuesday so people can evacuate. However, I really cannot. I can’t walk, can’t pack things up, can’t carry things to my car. It is ugly. I always hope and pray that hurricanes swing out to sea, but this one has me more freaked out than usual because of everything.
PPS – If you need me I’ll be on my couch, with my foot up on pillows and covered in ice. Can someone please deliver me some Ben & Jerry’s? What wine pairs well with ice cream? (seriously)