We all know that the crazy diets, “magic pills”, etc. do not work. The true secret to losing weight – eat healthy and exercise, it sounds so simple, yet at times it can be so hard.
I have been working very hard myself to count calories and exercise regularly in the midst of this FitFluential Diet Bet (the final weigh in is tomorrow). However, while I have been doing well and probably would win this on my own, as I have been marathon training and eating healthy, I discovered some new weight loss tricks along the way.
1. Get the flu – you are miserable, have epic hot flashes and ridiculous cold chills, sleep 16-18 hours a day, feel like hell, and end up with a fever so high you pray to God that you don’t die and become one of those flu statistics because you are sure you are not going to make it through the night. (You also text your two best friends and tell them to remove anything inappropriate from your house before your parents have to clean it out.)
However, as you are only awake about 6 hours a day, feel like you got hit by a bus, and must force yourself to eat you end up way, way below your calorie goal everyday for an entire week.
2. Accidently give yourself food poisoning – you will spend all night puking your guts out, vomiting so hard it comes out of your nose, get absolutely no sleep, spend multiple days feeling disgusting, be so weak you feel as though you could pass out at any moment, and spend all your energy trying not to heave on everyone you come into contact with when you are forced to go into work because you just took multiple days off the week before with the flu.
On the plus side though you can eat next to nothing. I subsided for two whole days on just this loaf of bread, Sprite, and water. More calories disappearing like crazy, Win!
Obviously, this is a joke. Getting food poisoning and the flu were horrible and in truth with the crazy way I work out I end up with a higher calorie deficit from my ridiculous sweat sessions than I do from not eating and vomiting my guts out. Miserable. Not worth it. Worst way to lose weight ever!
Sorry there is no weekly Sunday recipe this week, I cannot ever think about food like that right now. I pray to the heavens I’ll be back, healthy, eating, and cooking next week.
Until then – Don’t eat tomatoes that taste a bit off, turns out they are rotten.
Another lesson I should be old enough and smart enough to not learn the hard way.
Bless my heart! (That is Southern for a whole string of mean words mommas don’t like you to say.)
What you do this weekend while I was couch bound?
Tell me fun stories. Let me live vicariously.